&nbsp

12/29/15

This isn't the last comeback

It's hard to take a picture of moving figures, but at the same time, it makes a nice artistic blurriness. 

Five unrelated thoughts:
  1. Wow, sorry for not posting in a while. Again. 
  2. In the five years that I’ve been doing Nanowrimo, this year is the first year that I’ve lost. Life just got in the way. College, work, volunteering, and procrastination became too much for me in November.  
  3. Christmas Eve for me this year was just bad. It involved California, the freeways, and a suicide (thankfully not to anyone close to me).
  4. I like being single. To the point where one time when I saw a dog somewhere on campus, I went straight to the dog and started petting it; barely acknowledged the owner who was aesthetically cute. 
  5. I somehow thought that this post was a good enough to post with this picture of my siblings in Balboa Park
And now the weather:
Và Như Thế by 365daband
According to vdict.com, the title translates to And Like That

~ Stacy N.
Read More

10/22/15

"You know, you'e a feminist."


A little long (about thirty minutes) but well worth the watch. It will make you laugh, think, and feel a bit differently about gender.

Memorable quotes:
"I'm just as human as the man, that I'm just as worthy of acknowledgement"
"We make them feel as though by being born female they're already guilty of something."
"The problem with gender, is that it prescribes how we should be rather than recognizing how we are."
"I have chosen to no longer be apologetic for my femaleness and for my feminity."
"Feminist, a person who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes." (where Beyonce originally got her definition from.)
"a feminist is a man or a woman who says, 'Yes there's a problem with gender as it is today, and we must fix it. We must do better.'"

The title and video are from a TEDxEuston talk, "We should all be feminists" by Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie.
~ Stacy N.
Read More

10/20/15

A more formal introduction to my Nanowrimo 2015 "novel"

Bigger version here
Watercolor texture by So-ghislaine
Skull and rock texture by longlongwaydown 
Font is Jenna Sue
Title: collections of me

Short version: A collection of short stories ranging from the supernatural to the contemporary.

Long version: Stories range from the unconventional fairy tale ("Wait, you don't want to be rescued?") all the way down to the one or two sentence stories. There will also be messy splashes of carefully selected au's, such as "Why are you choosing that for a gift to give to your crush?" and "inappropriately timed proposals". As well as, sprinkles of creative writing prompts given out by writing teachers.

And now the weather:
Broke Into Words by Amy Vachal
~ Stacy N.
Read More

10/15/15

Nanowrimo 2015


Wow, Nanowrimo is in seventeen days, and I definitely do not feel very prepared for it at all. Instead of getting an idea in the summer like I usually do, I got an idea right around this month. Last week in fact. And as usual, it came to me through a dream. A dream that involved a cloudy day, a forest, an asexual and aromantic prince, and a gay maiden who’s willingly locked herself up in a tower. It’s a weird fairy tale (if you could even call it that), whose plot I’m still trying to figure out. All I know is that it’s going to involve a lot of talking, with a failed seduction angle.

I’m also going to write other short stories, this year. Not quite as fairy tale-ish as the dream one. But still quite as weird. The other stories are mainly au ideas that I’ve collected on tumblr. Ones that relate with me in some way, like “Is there a reason why you never say my first name?” and “Why does this cost TEN DOLLARS THIS IS AN OUTRAGE”. Some are going to be a few stories that are just writing prompts that my creative writing teacher gave out in class. And a few (or maybe a lot) of short stories that are one or two sentences long. Those ones are inspired by Lydia Davis’s writing style.

Well, I’ve revealed too much about what I’m going to write this year. So, before I spoil anything else, I’m going to hold off on telling you guys what the book title is going to be. As well as, what the book cover looks like. Because I’m still in the process of finalizing it. Even though it seems pretty final right now. But if you really want to know, you can always go to my Nanowrimo page under the username 1018mockingjay.
See ya.

And now the weather:
Hoot by Girls' Generation

~ Stacy N.

Read More

10/12/15

Feminism is such a "dirty" word



Feminism ain't a dirty word, people.
Posted by HuffPost Women on Friday, October 9, 2015


Feminism ain't a dirty word, people, video by HuffPost Women.
"But if you say you're not a feminist, at least understand what the term actually means."
"Feminism is a choice, and if a woman does not want to be a feminist, that is her right, but it is still my responsibility to fight for her rights." "Feminism (n.) Plural" by Roxane Gay in Bad Feminist Essays

Personally, I believe that you should look at the whole picture before settling upon a decision. If you really cannot identify as a feminist, then that's okay. It's not my responsibility to tell you what to do with your life. I'm not you. But it is my responsibility to protect and fight for the rights that you deserve. Because you, and every other person in this world deserve better than what society is giving us. You and everybody else deserve equality. 
And that's one of the many reasons why I'm a feminist in the first place. 
~ Stacy N.
Read More

9/24/15

It's okay to make mistakes

source
Humans are inherently flawed creatures. This includes the random person that you meet on the street all the way up to the influential people that you only hear about through the media. So, don’t try to put a person up on a pedestal, like the leader of some country, and then expect them to fix them every single problem. Because they’re only one person, and they could only do so much.
And the person on the pedestal is not a god or Superman. So don’t idolize them to the point where they’re not even human anymore. Because that pressures them to be Perfect. Which is scary and bad, because when they mess up, it’s a humongous deal and they’re now monsters. Even if the mistake was a small one.
Also, learn how to forgive the people you admire for making mistakes. They probably didn’t know that what they did was wrong. And hopefully, they’re taught on what they did was wrong, and then they’ll hopefully learn from that experience and try not to make that same mistake again. Also, as I said before, humans aren’t perfect.
And since humans are not perfect that means that human made groups like feminism are also not perfect. Feminism, like anything else, is flawed. It’s forever changing. It’s complex. And it doesn’t capture everything wrong with the world. However, by addressing what’s wrong with the world, like the double edged sword of female sexuality to the fact that there isn’t enough representation in Western media, Western literature, and anything else, it’s a step towards helping fixing everything that’s wrong with the world.
So learn about the problems that people have to face, come to conclusions with it, address it, and then try to teach other people about it. And remember it’s okay to mess up. As long as you learn from it, you’ll grow as a valuable human being.

Thoughts inspired by “Feminism (n.): Plural” from Bad Feminist by Roxane Gay and my Gender 2500 class.
Also found a version of “Feminism (n.): Plural” that is a bit shorter than the one in the book. http://roxanegay.tumblr.com/post/36978885406/feminism-plural

And now the weather:
Neopolitan Dreams by Lisa Mitchell


~ Stacy N.
Read More

9/10/15

Puzzles on a Rainy Day (A pretentious sounding poem)

Inspired by "In a Station of the Metro" by Ezra Pound

source
White puzzle pieces in an empty box;
Broken hearts inside hollow rib cages. 

And now the weather: 
~ Stacy N.
Read More

9/8/15

Just College Things

  • It’s pretty damn cool that the professors here are required to call people by their preferred name and preferred pronouns.
  • Inwardly moaning about printing costs, and how it’s eventually going to add up.
  • Walking everywhere, mainly in the heat (darn you Utah), and up and down hills and stairs. 
  • Starting to become a hungry college student (probably from a lot of walking and thinking), and probably be one of the few who doesn’t get the freshman fifteen. 
  • Tired. 
  • Cursing about parking on game days.
  • Reading a lot of great, surprising, weird, and/or sometimes okay stories. 
  • There’s usually some kind of event going on somewhere on campus, like a farmer’s market, a club’s social, meeting the dean of your college, etc. 
  • There’s peace, quiet, and comfy chairs in the library. 
  • Getting lost while driving around campus. 
  • That excitement about going to the local bookstore to grab some books for class. And exploring all the little nooks and crannies of that place. 
  • Procrastination
  • Accidentally being late for work (look back at the getting lost around campus, and the many events that are happening). 
  • Fingerprinting and how modern it is now.  
  • Kind of dreading and kind of excited about getting to play with little kids for my gender class. 
  • There’s free food somewhere.
  • Finally knowing the meaning of a broke college student. 
  • Writing papers in the middle night (look back at procrastination and look down at the schedule) 
  • Trying to juggle my schedule so it could fit school, study, work, and fun. As one of my department leaders from work said, “It’s like Jenga” or something like that. 
  • Meeting lots of people.
  • Hanging out with friends. 
  • Studying almost everywhere, at work, home, school, and on the Trax train. 
  • Slowly getting used to the Trax train and bus system that’s in Utah.
  • Getting a new laptop and trying to make that become a bit like the old one. 
  • Windows 10 and the school internet.
  • Thinking that one of my exes was going to another college. But nope the joke is on me. Oh well, at least we have different schedules, so the chance of actually running into each other is pretty low. 
  • Busy, busy, busy.
  • Feeling happy because its college, where you (slowly) become your own independent self. 
And now the weather:
~ Stacy N.
Read More

9/4/15

2015-2016 College Goals

texture source
font: yu gothic
~ Stacy N.
Read More

8/17/15

Toto, I've a feeling I'm not in high school anymore

Source
Well college is exactly a week away and I’m both freaking out and excited about it. Freaking out because of the many decisions that I have to make (mainly financial), and just knowing that I actually have to become an adult. Though it’s a bit hard to become a full-fledged adult when I still live with my parents and still haven’t figured everything out yet, like taxes. Excited because I’m finally in college and could make my own decisions, like not taking classes so early in the morning. Also, because I’m three classes away from finishing my general ed requirements.  Leaving me a lot of room to finish all the requirements for an English major, business minor, and maybe a gender studies minor, as well as take other classes that I like.
That reminds me, here are the classes that I’m going to be taking this fall:

Critical Introduction to Literary Forms
Or as I like to call it, step one for acquiring an English major. This class will most likely involve a lot of writing and reading. Which is both yay and nay. Yay, because I love reading (as you may have already noticed) and analyzing the text because it gives deeper meaning to the work as a whole. Nay, because I’m not a big fan of writing essays.

Beginning Vietnamese I
Finally a language course that will hopefully fit my needs. After living eighteen or so years in a Vietnamese home, I’ve only managed to speak a few words/phrases of the language. Which is certainly not enough to carry on a conversation with someone. However, I can understand some of it, to a certain extent. And not having enough motivation to study Vietnamese on my own (after so and so failed attempts), it’s nice to find a teacher willing to teach it in a small classroom setting. Hopefully, this will stick and I can speak a bit more Vietnamese to my family by the end of the school year.

Here I Stand: An Intro to Gender Studies
Where I learn more about the discrimination against gender and/or lgbtqia+ minorities. Which will probably anger me, as I learn more about the injustice that is found in our society and around the world. However, this is also a class I look forward to taking because it will help me get out of my comfort zone and develop my leadership skills (which is so-so). And by developing my leadership skills, I mean I’m going to an after school program for K-6 graders, with a group of my classmates, and mentor little kids. Which is extremely terrifying to me, because one, I don’t teach; two, I’m not that great with little kids; and three, just the fact that they’re eventually going to look up to me makes me feel even older than I already am. Hopefully, it will be worth it though.

Introduction to Creative Writing
As you can deduce from the title, this class is not going to involve writing critical essays about the symbolism of the green light in The Great Gatsby or another symbolic item in another great work of literature. However, this class might involve fanfiction that includes the green light from The Great Gatsby. It’s also most likely going to involve quite a few writer’s blocks; coffee; crazy stories about who knows what; and poetry about the large, mysterious void that is the future.

And there you have it, part one of my classes that I’m going to be taking this year. And as you can see, math will not be involved, nor will I take it in the spring. This is a grave choice that I’m making because eventually I have to take it if I want that business minor. 

And now the weather:
~ Stacy N.
Read More

8/15/15

Movies that I can't help but love

sources: |x|x|x|

My (top?) three favorite animated movies
  • Anastasia (which is not a Disney movie, it's by 20th Century Fox)
  • Mulan
  • The Princess and the Frog
Why I like them?
  • The girl saves the day
  • There's racial diversity. Anastasia is Russian, Mulan is Chinese, and Tiana is black. And that's not what you see often in the media. 
  • The main character finds her family, both literally (in the case of Anastasia) and figuratively. 
  • There's a good musical soundtrack. 
  • It's a twist on the old-fashioned fairy tale/myth.
  • There's a sassy/jazz player/adorable animal friend.
And honestly, it was hard trying to find movies like these when I was growing up. Especially movies that didn't' involve objectifying the girl in some way; where the cast wasn't all white; and where it didn't use any offensive racial stereotypes. Because by now, I'm tired of having at least one of these in almost every movie that I watch. 


~ Stacy N.
Read More

8/13/15

I'm back, again

Darn it, I did it again. Leave for two months and then come back, breaking my new year’s resolution that I can never seem to keep. However, this time I intend to keep it. But the likelihood of that actually happening is a bit low because of college and the busyness and stress that come with it. So expect posts occurring at least once a month or once every two months.
Also, start expecting posts that are just giant lists of what I’ve been doing during the time I was gone from this blog. An example would be the giant list that I’m about to give you, filling in the details of what’s been happening between the last time I published a blog post and now.
P.S. The list is not in chronological order.

Graduating and senior pictures.










From left to right: A blurry photo of the senior sunset; a dark photo
of ducks taken at the school president's house; part one of the senior prank; and
the yearbook stomp.
  • Enjoy the last week of school by going to a senior dinner dance, a senior sunset, a senior breakfast, and a yearbook stomp.
  • Go to a party at the school president’s house.
  • Apply to a million jobs.
  • Finally land a job interview at a movie theater.
  • Get a job at said movie theater.
  • Work, and experience the joys (and annoyances) of customer service.
  • Procrastinate.

The senior dinner dance



  • Get into another reading slump.
  • Watch a lot of youtube videos.
  • Shop for various things like pens and books.
  • Watch a lot of movies like Jurassic World, Pitch Perfect 2, Inside Out, and various others.
  • Watch a lot of television shows like Orange is the New Black and America’s Got Talent.
  • Meet new people.
  • Go to an orientation at the University of Utah, which was pretty fun (except for a few parts).




One of my last senior selfies. 

  • Driving and the joys of it.
  • Get a haircut.
  • Get sick for a week and miss the simple little pleasure of not coughing every day.
  • Have various projects done to my house, like installing insulation and having the garage cleaned.
  • Play Pokémon Diamond on my phone and slowly become a Pokémon master.
  • Get another eye exam and find out that my vision slightly improved.
  • Family time.
  • Think a lot about the Asian culture.










Pictures that I took earlier this summer. 

  • Eat yummy Vietnamese food.
  • Help my little brother with school stuff.
  • Deal with an abnormally working laptop.
  • Buy/check out books.
  • Listen to music from the Pitch Perfect 2 soundtrack.
  • Sleep.
  • Try to be an adult.
~ Stacy N.
Read More

5/22/15

One step away from graduating

Left: my school's navy blue cap and gown; white, yellow, and blue tassel; and yellow and white cords that I'm going to wear on June 5.
Bottom right: Trader Joe's cookie butter cheesecake bites and Private Selection''s chocolate hazelnut mascarpone ice cream
Top right: My school's literary magazine that just came out. It includes a few pieces by yours truly. And  all it took was a few months of hard work from my Satorian team.
After two months of lots of schoolwork, late school nights, tests of various sorts including those awful, soul-sucking, three-hour AP exam, an,d of course, procrastination, I’m back. (More or less).  And I know I should be a bit sorry that I was gone again, with no explanation, but I honestly don’t feel that. Because, I feel like I have an obligation to post all that often. Other than the bare minimum of posting at least once a month, which I set out to do as a New Year’s Resolution.
However, that doesn’t mean that I haven’t thought about this blog at all. No, in fact, I’ve been thinking about this blog a lot. Mainly, when I’m listening to music or watching youtube videos or watching Fresh Off the Boat (the TV show that's based off of Eddie Huang's memoir) or read articles about various topics. That leads to an idea that I want to blog about. So I then would go to my blogger posts, and write down a few quick points of what I should say in that post. But that mostly consists of links to other websites, which past me would expect future me to click on, so I could remember what I was going to write about. Or if it was a youtube video, I would save that video to my blog playlist, so future me would have to look at eventually. So I could remember what I was going to blog about or what to post for “and now the weather”.
But life happens, and it isn’t until weeks later that I finally decide to post something. And it usually happens to be something that I wasn’t originally planning on blogging about. Like this post for example. 

~ Stacy N.
Read More

4/15/15

A snowy spring day


Happy hump day everybody, and sorry for not posting lately. My mind has been acting a little weird. Plus, there’s also the classic excuse of school, studying for AP exams, looking for jobs and scholarships, and worrying about college. Mix in the fact that I haven’t been getting much sleep on school nights. So that led to a very tired me, who’s been unable to think of anything to post. Till now.

And that was due to a very snowy day in Utah and dangerous driving conditions. So I was able to be excused from school for the day, to rest and catch up on homework. Which I never noticed that I needed till now. And honestly, it’s pretty relaxing.

So here’s to April rain showers turning into April snow showers, and day offs from a school system that really needs reforming.

And now the weather:
Safe and Sound by Taylor Swift cover by Isaac from 365daband
~ Stacy N.
Read More

4/4/15

There's a widening crack,

source
Dear me,
I hate you, I hate you, I hate you. Yet, I love you, I love you, I love you. 
- me

And now the weather:
Immortals byFall Out Boy
~ Stacy N.
Read More

4/2/15

Books and their disturbing truths.

Sorry about March’s mini-reviews being two days late. Life and school has been causing quite a havoc lately. And it probably won’t settle down anytime soon. But I’m not going to let that stop me from posting. So without further ado, here are the March reviews.

Invisible Man

by Ralph Ellison

First published in 1952 and immediately hailed as a masterpiece, Invisible Man is one of those rare novels that have changed the shape of American literature. For not only does Ralph Ellison's nightmare journey across the racial divide tell unparalleled truths about the nature of bigotry and its effects on the minds of both victims and perpetrators, it gives us an entirely new model of what a novel can be.
As he journeys from the Deep South to the streets and basements of Harlem, from a horrifying "battle royal" where black men are reduced to fighting animals, to a Communist rally where they are elevated to the status of trophies, Ralph Ellison's nameless protagonist ushers readers into a parallel universe that throws our own into harsh and even hilarious relief. Suspenseful and sardonic, narrated in a voice that takes in the symphonic range of the American language, black and white, Invisible Man is one of the most audacious and dazzling novels of our century.

My thoughts: I am invisible, understand, simply because people refuse to see me.
A five hundred eighty-one page book read in three or so days, for an in-class English essay. Mix in other homework, and you get a very burned out girl. However, it was worth it because it gave me a few new insights about racism. I’ve learned that racism differs a bit between the South and the North of the U.S. In the South, blacks are treated like animals, as seen in the Battle Royal chapter. While in the North, the blacks are used as tools to mainly make the whites look good. And then when there’s trouble, the whites aren’t there. Instead, they just let the blacks suffer on their own.
This book also taught me a bit of the lack of community, that’s found in the African American literature. And that made me see how easy it is for blacks to turn their backs on someone within their community. Because that person did some horrible crime, or “abandoned” the community to go work with the whites, but mainly it’s because that person is inferior to the rest of the community.
Overall, it was a pretty good read, with a few disgusting bits here and there. So, if you could stand violence, sexual, and racist scenes, then I would recommend that you read this book. If you can’t, that’s fine, as well.
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Boundless

by Cynthia Hand
The past few years have held more surprises than part-angel Clara Gardner could ever have anticipated. Yet from the dizzying highs of first love, to the agonizing low of losing someone close to her, the one thing she can no longer deny is that she was never meant to live a normal life.
Since discovering the special role she plays among the other angel-bloods, Clara has been determined to protect Tucker Avery from the evil that follows her . . . even if it means breaking both their hearts. Leaving town seems like the best option, so she’s headed back to California - and so is Christian Prescott, the irresistible boy from the vision that started her on this journey in the first place.
As Clara makes her way in a world that is frighteningly new, she discovers that the fallen angel who attacked her is watching her every move. And he’s not the only one. . . . With the battle against the Black Wings looming, Clara knows she must finally fulfill her destiny. But it won’t come without sacrifices and betrayal.
In the riveting finale of the Unearthly series, Clara must decide her fate once and for all.

My thoughts: My home is you.
To be honest, the only reason why I kept on reading the Unearthly books was because of Clara’s and Tucker’s relationship. They made me smile because their love was as bright as Clara’s glory. And it honestly hurt my heart, when one of the ending scenes happened (hint it involves a lake and the other side). I also found this book a bit funny, because conveniently Tucker always shows up at his barn when Clara pops up. Though of course, it would have been more dramatic if one of Tucker’s other family members found Clara.
In fact, this book needed a bit more drama, because despite everything, it’s still going pretty well for Clara.
Oh, lucky you the other evil angel bloods haven’t found you, the other Stanford students aren’t at all suspicious of your Glory, you’re a pretty good fighter, etc. (A small collection of my thoughts as I was reading the book).
Overall, the book was a nice read because of Tucker’s and Clara’s love, (mainly) best friend relationship between Christian and Clara, and the interesting take on Hell and Heaven. However, this book was also a bit slow for me.
Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

Beloved

by Toni Morrison

Staring unflinchingly into the abyss of slavery, this spellbinding novel transforms history into a story as powerful as Exodus and as intimate as a lullaby.
Sethe was born a slave and escaped to Ohio, but eighteen years later she is still not free. She has too many memories of Sweet Home, the beautiful farm where so many hideous things happened. Her new home is haunted by the ghost of her baby, who died nameless and whose tombstone is engraved with a single word: Beloved.
Filled with bitter poetry and suspense as taut as a rope, Beloved is a towering achievement by Nobel Prize laureate Toni Morrison.

My thoughts: Freeing yourself was one thing; claiming ownership of that freed self was another.
Before I even read the very first page of this book, I got chills. And it all started when my English teacher was talking about what this book was about, racism and the dehumanization of blacks. But what really chilled me, was the fact that Sixty Million and more people died during the Middle Passage. Innocent people, who were forced from their homes so they could be treated like objects in the new world.
As I continued to read the book, the chills only seemed to get stronger. Because of the terrible things the whites did to the blacks. And the creepiness of Beloved herself. She is definitely a character to not be messed with, because of her supernatural powers.
Overall, this book helped me see how sometimes physically dying would be better than dying spiritually, how in the south the blacks are treated like animals, and that it’s not healthy to repress the past or to dwell in it.
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

The Twice Lost

by Sarah Porter
Mermaids have been sinking ships and drowning humans for centuries, and now the government is determined to put an end to the mermaid problem—by slaughtering all of them. Luce, a mermaid with exceptionally threatening abilities, becomes their number-one target, hunted as she flees down the coast toward San Francisco. There she finds hundreds of mermaids living in exile under the docks of the bay. These are the Twice Lost: once-human girls lost first when a trauma turned them into mermaids, and lost a second time when they broke mermaid law and were rejected by their tribes. Luce is stunned when they elect her as their leader. But she won’t be their queen. She’ll be their general. And they will become the Twice Lost Army—because this is war.

My thoughts: But a man's walking-around body can be a ghost a whole lot easier than his spirit can.
I found myself thinking about how we as humans just have this natural tendency to harm those who are slightly different from us. Whether it’s because of the color of our skin, our sexuality, our race, or what kind of species we are in this case. And, I couldn’t help but wonder why?
For this novel, the reason why humans are killing mermaids is because the mermaids were sinking ships, which caused the deaths of many. However, the mermaids were sinking ships, in revenge of what has happened to them, when they were once human. That’s right, the mermaids in this book were once humans, human girls in fact. But due to some traumatic event that no one should ever go through, they turn into mermaids. And like sirens, they sing people to their deaths.
Now, the mermaids are trying to change and not kill people with their voices. However, that’s a teensy bit hard when you’re in war, but they somehow managed it.
The Twice Lost also has a Disney’s Little Mermaid subplot going on here. However, the guy isn’t a prince, and he’s actually in love with the mermaid who saved him. And the mermaid herself doesn’t lose her voice nor does she go to a sea witch (human doctors) to turn back into a human. In fact, there’s quite a twist at the end that actually surprised me.
Overall, I like how this book focuses on a variety of relationships, such as romantic, platonic, familial, straight, and lesbian (though not as much as I would like). This book also shows what grief can do to a person. And it also breaks a common ending that’s found in most YA books, in which the main character and the love interest are together and more or less happy because everything is okay now.
Rating: 3.5 out of 5 stars


And now the weather:
Is There Anybody Out There by DANakaDAN ft Clara C
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/27/15

The smell of starting over again.

source
"I like the smell of rain."
"Why?"
"Because, it's the smell of starting over again."


And now the weather:
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/25/15

Why I'm a Feminist.

Note: These are my opinions about what feminism is. I'm not claiming these to be right, in fact, my opinions could be completely wrong. If so, please tell me so I could be willing to learn from it. 

source
Picture reads:

Feminist: A person who believes in the social, political, and economic equality of the sexes.

If you asked me to define feminism, I would say that it’s basic human rights (social, economic, and political) for everyone. Whether you’re a woman, a man, a person who identifies as both male and female, a person who identifies as neither male or female, a person of color, white, lgbtqia+, disabled, able bodied, poor, middle class, rich, old, young, etc.

[But]Discrimination against homosexuals isn't a feminist problem. Yes, it is indeed a feminist problem. There are women and other people who are gay, bi, transgender, etc, and they have to deal with homophobes, misogynists, biphobes, transphobic people, etc.  In fact, any kind of discrimination is a feminist problem, because as this tumblr ask says, the category of women still includes women of color, and gay women, and women with disabilities, and trans women, and poor women, and so forth.

But feminism focuses on women, what about the men? Feminism is also about undoing the harmful effects the patriarchy. It’s about telling men that it’s okay to have emotions, to cry. It’s also about telling them, hey it’s okay to wear “girl” clothes and do “girly” things. Because being feminine does not equate to being weak. It’s also about building more shelters for men who’ve been abused. It’s about protecting those who’ve been raped and laughed at by others (usually men) because they must have wanted it. It’s about tearing down the stereotype that men are sexually hungry beasts, and more. That’s what feminism can do for men.

So all in all, to me feminism is about showing that women are humans and not sexual objects to be ogled at. It’s about letting us have the right to do almost* whatever it is we want with our body, without getting criticized for it. Whether it’s get an abortion, a tattoo, a piercing, cutting our hair short, not shaving, wearing makeup, etc.

Feminism is about being whatever we want, whether it’s masculine or feminine or both or neither.  It’s about choosing whatever we want to do without being criticized for it. Whether you want to be a lawyer who works a lot or a houseparent who loves taking care of kids. To me, feminism helps those who are disabled. And telling them, yes their views do count and that they’re not monsters.

Feminism is about letting people wear makeup, whether it’s because they want to do it for themselves or because they want to do it for other people. It’s about having the right to not shave or to shave because you want to do it.

 Feminism is about showing, hey you’re not weak for being feminine nor are you weak for being masculine either. And any kind of “feminism” which bashes femininity, disabilities, people of color, lgbtqia+ people, men, and/or the poor is not feminism at all.

In general, Feminism is human equality for everyone on all levels.


*I say almost because if it involves any kind of eating disorder, pill overdose, cutting, or self harming in general, then you (or someone you know) should stop and get help immediately. Here are a few hotlines (mainly phone numbers, with a few online hotlines, and emails) that can help you. 

Depression Hotline: 1-630-482-9696
Suicide Hotline: 1-800-784-8433
LifeLine: 1-800-273-8255
Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386
Sexuality Support: 1-800-246-7743
Eating Disorders Hotline: 1-847-831-3438
Rape and Sexual Assault: 1-800-656-4673
Grief Support: 1-650-321-5272
Runaway: 1-800-843-5200, 1-800-843-5678, 1-800-621-4000
Exhale:After Abortion Hotline/Pro-Voice: 1-866-439-4253
Child Abuse: 1-800-422-4453

UK Helplines:
Samaritans (for any problem): 08457909090 e-mail jo@samaritans.org
Childline (for anyone under 18 with any problem): 08001111
Mind infoline (mental health information): 0300 123 3393 e-mail: info@mind.org.uk
Mind legal advice (for people who need mental-health related legal advice): 0300 466 6463 legal@mind.org.uk
b-eat eating disorder support: 0845 634 14 14 (only open Mon-Fri 10.30am-8.30pm and Saturday 1pm-4.30pm) e-mail: help@b-eat.co.uk
b-eat youthline (for under 25’s with eating disorders): 08456347650 (open Mon-Fri 4.30pm - 8.30pm, Saturday 1pm-4.30pm)
Cruse Bereavement Care: 08444779400 e-mail: helpline@cruse.org.uk
Frank (information and advice on drugs): 0800776600
Drinkline: 0800 9178282
Rape Crisis England & Wales: 0808 802 9999 (open 2 - 2.30pm 7 - 9.30pm) e-mail info@rapecrisis.org.uk
Rape Crisis Scotland: 08088 01 03 02 (every day, 6pm to midnight)

India Self Harm Hotline: 00 08001006614
India Suicide Helpline: 022-27546669
Kids Help Phone (Canada): 1-800-668-6868, Free and available 24/7

Suicide hotlines:
Argentina: 54-0223-493-0430
Australia: 13-11-14
Austria: 01-713-3374
Barbados: 429-9999
Belgium: 106
Botswana: 391-1270
Brazil: 21-233-9191
China: 852-2382-0000
(Hong Kong: 2389-2222)
Costa Rica: 606-253-5439
Croatia: 01-4833-888
Cyprus: 357-77-77-72-67
Czech Republic: 222-580-697, 476-701-908
Denmark: 70-201-201
Egypt: 762-1602
Estonia: 6-558-088
Finland: 040-5032199
France: 01-45-39-4000
Germany: 0800-181-0721
Greece: 1018
Guatemala: 502-234-1239
Holland: 0900-0767
Honduras: 504-237-3623
Hungary: 06-80-820-111
Iceland: 44-0-8457-90-90-90
Ireland: 1800-247-100
Israel: 09-8892333
Italy: 06-705-4444
Japan: 3-5286-9090
Latvia: 6722-2922, 2772-2292
Malaysia: 03-756-8144
(Singapore: 1-800-221-4444)
Mexico: 525-510-2550
Netherlands: 0900-0767
New Zealand: 4-473-9739
New Guinea: 675-326-0011
Nicaragua: 505-268-6171
Norway: 47-815-33-300
Philippines: 02-896-9191
Poland: 52-70-000
Portugal: 239-72-10-10
Russia: 8-20-222-82-10
Serbia: 21-6623-393
Spain: 91-459-00-50
South Africa: 0861-322-322
South Korea: 2-715-8600
Sweden: 031-711-2400
Switzerland: 143
Taiwan: 0800-788-995
Thailand: 02-249-9977
Trinidad and Tobago: 868-645-2800
Ukraine: 0487-327715
Uruguay: 095 73 8483
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/22/15

Words in its many different forms

source
March madness, full of little sleep and a lot of tests. By now calming down because third term just ended, and fourth term is about to begin at exactly 8:30 am tomorrow. Which gives me some time to write about this month’s TCWT prompt:
“What are your thoughts on reading or writing books in non-novel formats? Are there any you’ve particularly enjoyed?”
If you asked me what non-novel formats that I’ve written in my eighteen year lifetime, I will give you a list. And on that list will contain a variety of items like blog posts, personal essays, short stories, six word stories, poetry, a script, a failed web diary for a character of mine, and more. It’s certainly not everything under the word-filled sun, but it’s enough for you to get that I’m a pretty curious writer who’s willing to try almost anything.

Now if you asked me which non-novel format that I enjoy writing the most, the obvious answer would be short stories. Because the characters just come to me, not bothering to go through the questionnaire process. The time length usually doesn’t take days and weeks for me to sift through. And it’s easier to finish writing than most of my novels. Plus, there isn’t much of a structure to it, like villanelles and sonnets, other than the typical beginning, middle, and end.

That doesn’t mean that I don’t like writing in other non-novel formats, like poetry, personal essays, six word stories, and informal essays*. But after writing a lot of poetry in my literary writing class, it’s becoming a bit tedious. While personal essays are mainly for school and looking good for colleges and scholarships, depriving me of the personal part of the essay.  However, I do admit that six word stories are fun yet hard to write, because I’ve never really been a concise writer. And writing informal essays usually takes me hours to complete. But it’s worth it, after trying to find a way to piece all the little puzzle pieces of my mind together in a more or less clear way.

*When I talk about informal essays, I mean essays that address a certain topic that isn’t my life, and uses first and second person pronouns. An example of informal essays would be the monthly critiques of Our Mutual Friend by Charles Dickens that I have to do for English.

source
Now, let’s move onto reading non-novel formats, because that’s the fun part. Especially if it adds some deeper meaning to the book, history lesson, or television show that I’m currently reading, learning, or watching. Which happens a lot (aka all the time) in English class. In eleventh grade, before my teacher made us read any of the assigned novels, he would make us read short stories and poetry that relate to the time period of that novel. For example, when we were about to start modernism, he made us read one of Ernest Hemingway’s short stories, “Hills Like White Elephants”.

This was a particularly frustrating story to read because the characters are intentionally vague about what they’re talking about. Which fits the title of the story, because they’re talking about the white elephant in the room. So it makes you feel like you’re intruding on something private. And it isn’t until a lot of guessing that you later find out that the white elephant is abortion.

And it was clear from the start that they were talking about a white elephant, because the setting continually mentions the hills as being white. Which ties back to the title, “Hills Like White Elephants”. The setting also ties to how modernism uses setting as a symbol, a lot, especially seen in The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald (the book we read for that unit).

Now in my senior year of high school, my English teacher is making my class read various essays, to help us understand the books that we were reading. And some dealt with nineteenth century attitudes towards race, which made my stomach churn, threatening to make me vomit at what I was reading. However, this helped me better understand Joseph Conrad’s novella, Heart of Darkness. Other essays talked about Fyodor Dostoyevsky’s novel, Crime and Punishment. And another one was about “The Composition, Publication, and Reception of Our Mutual Friend”, which was by Robert L. Patten.

source
(The Boofer Lady is one of the
illustrations found in Our Mutual Friend)
Speaking of Our Mutual Friend, it’s by Charles Dickens. And back in his time, he would publish his books in monthly serials. Which was basically much one literary comic book** put out each month, for so and so months till that whole book was finished. And for Our Mutual Friend, he would publish roughly thirty-two pages each month from May 1864 to November 1865. And each monthly dealt with a variety of subjects from social commentary about the poor to the harmful effects of money. Which Dickens deftly writes about, by using a variety of techniques, like word choice and occasionally going into second person. Easily twisting my emotions and thoughts into this giant tangled web filled with frustration for certain characters and a small hope for others.

**It was more words than illustrations.

Now, I could continue on talking about other kinds of non-novel formats, like how it’s frustrating to read Shakespeare’s plays because of the confusing language. Or how I used to read a lot of graphic novels and manga when I was growing up, particularly Babymouse and Kitchen Princess. Because the pictures were well drawn, food was involved, and it had a good story to it. Or how beautiful some poems are because it’s about the experience, with no special meaning added to it.

But then there would be no ending.  And as L. Frank Baum once said, “Everything has to come to an end, sometime.”

P.S. Don’t forget to check out the other lovely bloggers who are also participating in the blog chain:

22nd – http://from-stacy.blogspot.com/ [You’re currently here]
[They'll announce the topic for next month’s chain.]

And now the weather:
Clint Eastwood by Electronic Swing Orchestra
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/19/15

I used to rescue myself from dragons with evil breath, but now I breathe those evil breaths myself.


source
Their breath stank up the stale room
Offering no chance of escape
I found escape anyways

In little ways
The light of a flashing alarm
The dripping of a broken fountain
The smell of burnt paper

But that all went away
As I breathed their very stank
Offering no one a chance of escape

And now the weather:
This is My Paradise by Bridgit Mendler
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/15/15

The day she left, my heart was still in my chest


The day she left
The dishes were resting in the sink
And my heart was still in my chest

The house was in quiet unrest
And the cat couldn’t sleep a wink
The day she left

The books were still blessed
The clock still guessed
And my heart was still in my chest

The bedroom is in detest
And the dog couldn’t think
The day she left

The bird was still in its nest
The door still pink
And my heart was still in my chest

It was all for the best
Breaking off the link
The day she left
And my heart was still in my chest

And now the weather:
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/6/15

A battle of the heart

As I was looking through my drafts folder, I stumbled upon something that I've written a year ago. Reading through it, I felt the anger, the conflict flowing through this. And it's funny how that anger is gone by now. How one simple event can change all of that.
Your feelings will change. And everything in life is temporary. So try to make the best of it.
Now let's go see what my seventeen year old self was thinking of. With a few edits, of course.

Everything is dark, black, silent.
The only exception being a spotlight that shines down on a long metal tightrope. The ones that you would see in circuses, as people held their breath wondering if the performers were going to make it out whole again.
It is hard to see how high up the tightrope is. But from the vast emptiness that surrounds it, you can perceive that it is dangerously high. And from your spot on the floor, that is nothing but air, you cannot tell how many inches, feet, miles it stretches to and fro. But the only thing that you can tell is that the tightrope is very long indeed.
It’s cold and empty. Bitter words starts to enter your thoughts. Yet, they don’t stay for long, when something almost unusual starts to happen.
~.~.~
I take a deep breath, trying to calm down the confusing th-thump, th-thump, th-thumping of my heartbeat. But it’s hard when everything around me is so… distracting. Another step forward, another deep breath. Glad that I didn’t stumble and fall into this gaping darkness. If it weren’t for this balancing pole, I would have fallen long ago.

Another step and a gasp of surprise, when my body starts to lean towards one side of the gaping darkness. For something was grabbing at my stick. But the funny thing was, in that moment, and that moment only, I felt almost free. For when I was close to plummeting to my death, I felt a delicious amount of evil creep up my spine. It wraps me in its cold, sweet embrace. Whispering in my ears. Encouraging me to do something quite evil for once. To feel smug when someone else starts to suffer. To see the hurt that binds itself to their eyes. As they slowly realize that there truly is a monster found inside of me.

Another gasp, another tug, but this time it was on the other end of the stick. My legs are the air, trying to regain some kind of balance. Only it was hard when I find myself feeling so confined.  Some kind of light washes over me. Begging me, forcing me to continue doing good. To help others freely, even though it knows that I won't receive the same help if I asked for it in return. It asks me to love others just as much as I love myself, even though it knew that some of them did not deserve it. And throughout it all, it yells at me to keep my anger. To hold it all in, and to continue being the "sweet" little angel that I was supposed to be.

Little realizing that I’m actually a volcano, just waiting for the day when it all blows over. And all the people around me are nothing more than glass. Easily broken. Easily cracked. And easily thrown away.

And now the weather:
~ Stacy N.
Read More

3/3/15

A day at the park

Ants, big and black, crawl onto the black and white picnic blanket. Birds sing their annoyingly, cheerful songs. Cats dream of lazy things. Dogs bark and play, despite the afternoon heat. Eugene and I read, letting sweat gather onto our backs.
Families with tiresome kids, play their tiresome games in the distance. Guys giggle. Hell whispers that it wants its heat back. I start to wonder about Gaffer Hexam’s death. Jitters start to arise within Eugene.
Kites refuse to lift up and perform their graceful dances. Light, twinkling bells, indicating the ice cream cart’s presence, arrive just in time. Me, me, me’s soon replace them. Nauseousness starts to settle in the pits of my stomach.
Oak trees wither. People burn underneath the afternoon sun. Quietness is nowhere to be found. Red stains the pages of my book. Sadness edges its way to my eyes. The tears disappear as soon as they come.
Uneasiness soon captures Eugene in its terrible grasp. Very gently, he pushes it away and continues on reading. Words are not passed between us.
Xanadus whispers to those that are willing to listen. Yells begin again. Zorbing goes on nearby. 

~.~.~.~.~
This was my second attempt at an ABC story. And an ABC story is peculiar prompt that:
  • Must contain exactly 26 sentences. 
  • Each sentence must begin with a letter of the alphabet. 
  • It must go in order. 
  • It has to be a story. 
For example: A dog barks. Bees swim. Cats meow. Deer roam the story. Elephants gather. F... and so on.
It gets harder as you get farther into the story, especially when you try to find words that start with the letter X. But, that's the fun part of it. This prompt really forces you to use your creative juices. And I can now see why, my literary writing teacher decided to give it to my class, on that bright winter morning.

And now the weather:
How We Love by Ingrid Michaelson
~ Stacy N.
Read More

2/28/15

Oh my love

Oh my love for reading hasn't been going strong this month. College scholarships and FAFSA, is making me feel old. School is taking too much of my time. Sleep has been something that I avoid and crave at the same time. And youtube has been a constant distractor ever since I stumbled upon 365DaBand. However, I've managed to squeeze in some time to read for fun, but it's oftentimes for school.
So without further avoidance, here are the mini reviews for February.

Sinner

by Maggie Stiefvater
A standalone companion book to the internationally bestselling Shiver Trilogy.
Sinner follows Cole St. Clair, a pivotal character from the #1 New York Times bestselling Shiver Trilogy. Everybody thinks they know Cole's story. Stardom. Addiction. Downfall. Disappearance. But only a few people know Cole's darkest secret -- his ability to shift into a wolf. One of these people is Isabel. At one point, they may have even loved each other. But that feels like a lifetime ago. Now Cole is back. Back in the spotlight. Back in the danger zone. Back in Isabel's life. Can this sinner be saved?
My thoughts: Isabel and Cole reminds me of my characters Eliza, Peter, Lana, and Parker. They’re wild and reckless, in a way. They also remind me of myself, especially Isabel. Just trying to be empty, but can’t. And when I was reading about Isabel’s and Cole’s relationship, I wasn’t quite satisfied. What annoyed me was that they didn’t communicate enough about what was going on in their own lives, and about why they were acting that way. Instead, they simply assumed or never questioned each other about what was happening in each other’s life, especially on Isabel’s part. And that eventually lead to reckless mistakes.
I’ve also noticed that Maggie Stiefvater likes fancy cars.
Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

On Writing: A Memoir of the Craft

by Stephen King
"Long live the King" hailed "Entertainment Weekly" upon the publication of Stephen King's "On Writing." Part memoir, part master class by one of the bestselling authors of all time, this superb volume is a revealing and practical view of the writer's craft, comprising the basic tools of the trade every writer must have. King's advice is grounded in his vivid memories from childhood through his emergence as a writer, from his struggling early career to his widely reported near-fatal accident in 1999 -- and how the inextricable link between writing and living spurred his recovery. Brilliantly structured, friendly and inspiring, "On Writing" will empower and entertain everyone who reads it -- fans, writers, and anyone who loves a great story well told.
My thoughts: I know this has been said before, but Stephen King is a damn genius. As well as very honest. Unlike some of the other writing books that I’ve read in the past, this book was far from boring. It starts off with some of King’s past stories that helped shape him as a writer. And it’s funny or sad or joyful, depending on the story.
After that, came the writing process from when you first get an idea to the editing. And instead of covering everything there is to it, Stephen King goes for the main points. Such as how to deal with passive voice, how much you should edit out, and dialogue. And he’s concise about it too, because he doesn’t use a technical word on every page. Plus he still adds in comments about a few of his books and his life, with a writing voice that interests people. 
So definitely read this when you get the chance.
Rating: 5 out of 5 stars

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets

by J.K. Rowling
The Dursleys were so mean and hideous that summer that all Harry Potter wanted was to get back to the Hogwarts School for Witchcraft and Wizardry. But just as he's packing his bags, Harry receives a warning from a strange, impish creature named Dobby who says that if Harry Potter returns to Hogwarts, disaster will strike.
And strike it does. For in Harry's second year at Hogwarts, fresh torments and horrors arise, including an outrageously stuck-up new professor, Gilderoy Lockheart, a spirit named Moaning Myrtle who haunts the girls' bathroom, and the unwanted attentions of Ron Weasley's younger sister, Ginny.
But each of these seem minor annoyances when the real trouble begins, and someone--or something--starts turning Hogwarts students to stone. Could it be Draco Malfoy, a more poisonous rival than ever? Could it possibly be Hagrid, whose mysterious past is finally told? Or could it be the one everyone at Hogwarts most suspects...Harry Potter himself. 
My thoughts: After reading a few pages, putting it off, read one or two more pages, and putting it off, I finally sat down yesterday after school and read it. And despite, already knowing what happens (thanks movie version), I still enjoyed the book. I like how J.K. Rowling doesn’t describe everything, making it nice to interpret the story my way. I also like how fast paced the story was. And it was nice to see the character development in Ginny. Going from a Harry Potter fangirl, to one who was able to recognize what Tom Riddle was making her do, and trying to tell Harry about it. It’s also nice to see Hermione swoon a bit over Lockhart, and breaking the rules. Because that shows that there’s more to Hermione, than someone who’s good at school. I also couldn’t help but feel bad for Harry because of all the abuse he’s getting from the Dursleys.
Rating: 4 out of 5 stars

Sound and Sense

by Thomas R. Arp, Greg Johnson
There's no better way for you to learn about poetry and understand its elements than with PERRINE'S SOUND AND SENSE. Both a concise introduction to poetry and an anthology, this classic best-seller succinctly covers the basics of poetry with chapters on evaluating poetry, exemplary poetry selections that you'll enjoy reading, and exercises that help you understand each selection. Every poem included in this collection is not only a perfect illustration of the poetic concept at hand, but a remarkable work in its own right.
My thoughts: This was one of the many books that I had to read for my AP English Literature class this year. And it was, unsurprisingly, one of the more boring ones. However, it wasn’t like any other textbook that I’ve read. The author wrote it in a way that a typical person can understand it, with no big, fancy words on every page, and with very few technical terms. 
I also like some of the poems that were in there, even though figuring out their tone was hard. And it was nice to know that a poem can sometimes not have some special meaning. That a poem can be about eating blackberries, and that’s it. After all, the purpose of a poem is to communicate experience.
P.S. This book also made me realize, how much I don’t like annotating poetry, or writing essays about it. *Sighs*, I’m totally going to pass the poetry free response on the AP exam.
Rating: 3 out of 5 stars

And now the weather:
Oh My Love by 365DaBand (I can't help but find their English lyrics hilarious)
Uptown Funk by Mark Ronson ft. Bruno Mars
~ Stacy N.
Read More